You don't need me to review Spring Breakers because a bunch of people already have. Well I saw it yesterday, Easter Sunday, and I found it to be a mix of Five Little Monkeys Jumping on the Bed, Goldilocks and the Three Bears, Excess Baggage, Belly, and early 90s MTV Spring Break specials. It isn't nearly as exploitative as Teen Moms so don't worry about being offended. It also reminded me of my own spring break in Clearwater Beach, FL: 1992 - we had a few less guns but that didn't mean we still didn't find trouble, ok? We drove down with five girls in a '91 Cutlass and didn't stop to change drivers. Figure that out. Maybe I'll do a vine reenactment later.
Most of my movie reviews include what the people next to me were saying because I always have someone sitting in my area that feels the need to talk. A couple reasons for this are 1) I attract verbal communication and 2) southerners can't be quiet. The highlight this time was when the mother from the family sitting behind us whispered, "What's double penetration?"
What else do you want to know? This is not a movie review.
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