Like Ignatious J. Reilly and Greenburg (no need to see the movie – I’m referring the only interesting characteristic of the whole film), I have a compulsion to write letters (emails too) of complaint to businesses (and sometimes people) that deserve a good talking-to. I’m not all piss and vinegar though, I will also write letters commending excellent service like the email I sent to McDonalds for a certain employee’s outstanding attitude and impressive ability to remember my own personal sugar-to-cream ratio preferences for my iced coffee.
I have many, many things to complain about lately – including, but not limited to: the Emperor’s-New-Clothes-Style-Celebration of the movie “The Social Network” and the horrific labor politics being hashed out in Wisconsin. However, when one is powerless one must focus on small changes, so the issue I am focusing on this month is starting a campaign to force Amazon to create a mandated rating system for their Used Marketplace. In the new system it would be grounds for account termination if a seller listed a book that actually has writing on the pages, in any condition other than “acceptable” or below.
Aren’t you tired of buying used books on Amazon that have been marked “Good” or “Like New” and then when you get them there is yellow or pink highlighting all over the place – or worse - ink-pen underlining and sloppy freshman-lit notes like “sense of place” and “METAPHOR” written near, or sometimes even OVER the actual words on the page? It reminds me of being at the movies with a row of teenagers right up in my ear with their stupid comments and hormonally quavering giggles. God. Shut up. I can’t hear the elderly couple repeating everything to each other over here.
Unless signed by the author, no book that has been marked up by the hands of another should be rated in “good” condition. It is an outrage. Who underlines or highlights in a perfectly good book anyway? I cringe when people fold back the front cover of a paperback or put their drinks on top of a book just because it happens to be resting flat on a table. Coaster? NO. Notepad for your bullsh*t thoughts about the text? Definitely NOT.
The only time I ever marked up a book was when I was forced to by an English prof who told me marking the life out of the page was the proper way to read – “highlight or underline the key phrases as you go” – I was like, “for what?” Still, he stood right over me and made me highlight a sentence and then make a note in the margins. I wrote, the words “key phrases” and then he finally left me alone. If I was forced to highlight again, I would highlight every sentence I read as I went along and just use the place where the highlighting ends as my bookmark. That makes about as much sense as highlighting in the first place.
I make all of my notes for reading off-line, on colorful post-it notes or a notepad that I have nearby. Am I alone in this? What do y’all do? I mean, tell me about a time when defacing a book in the name of “engaged reading” ie: highlighting and underlining, has ever helped you. Do you go back, open up a book and say “I know I highlighted something verrrrrry important somewhere here….” or do you ever go back at all?
FYI: Amazon’s artificial intelligence customer service got back to me and made no acknowledgement of the Used-Buyer Manifesto I sent them (too powerful?). They just said to report unethical sellers to their investigation team. They want me to turn nark.
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